so i haven't been completely there for my blog

::::Meaning spilling stuff worth blogging::::

And I promise you there is always some thriling stuff to blog about'

Delaying it a day because lacck of food and energy...

2010 nik_gold defeats.. then CONQUERS only to


live_gold!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3


WhamWham! Shingai is her name

This Uk born singer is soooo FUNKY FRESH lol
google her and here is a sample of her work =)
Hope you love it**


Very Merry nik_gold*

I can't wait until my birthday
** I'm going to look, feel and BE miraculous!!!
It's almost Christmas and truthfully
** I'll be fine just being in a warm house with pleasant people and food
It's almost a new year
** And I don't know a thing I could have done differently for this one
I <3 Pretty people with Impeccable personalities
** I aspire to be the perfect me (not perfect)
Cleanliness is next to Godliness I learned the hard way
** "EWWWW what is that??!!"
I need to write a letter to Dad and rekindle my love affair with the family
** Before it's too late
I'm going to be super next year starting now
** Super grades, Super personality, Super outfits, Super job, Super skills, Super nik_gold!!
Positivity motivates me
** So I'm positively getting rid of the negative vixens in my life!



Mirror, Mirror on the Wall...

Improvement or just nice change??


It's a Done Deal

So I know tomorrow won't solve a damn thing.
Im hanging on to the epiphany that maybe something great will happen
Like God will hand deliver me a map and
From there I can see the stars, planets and the moons.
See what's new and which ones to wish on
So that someday my dream will come true.
Im not talking about another love story
The story love dooomed key
The sad all-I-need-love-to-find-my-way-in-life
My purpose
Im talking about that forever destiny drift
The one in which you find out the laws of nature and if you are god's one and only true gift
And in you I mean man the heavenly sinful thing
The take one look back and you turn into a grain of sand?
That goodness the stuff you feel down in your soul
Feeling lonely but never alone
You wiping your tears away, stating your life lessons on facebook and twitter so that someone can "like" or "repost"
But no one can repost your life
Your need of life
Nor your feed on life not even the dying sun
Bearing itself down to you so that you can see the light
In all it's glory and its last true fight

Heavy anticipation dims down at me cause I know

Tomorrow won't change a damned thing
Seeing you and all the guilt you bring
Weighing my heart down more than it ever has
For the guilt I already had for being born a love child.
No this ain't the "I hate my daddy" poem or the " I was raped but now Im better" storm
This shit right here... this shit right here??!!
Has no category, sits on its on territory
Drifting gently from sea to sea
Terrorizing me
Whimsically not giving a FU**
The life of misery unsolved because I know

Tomorrow won't chnage a damn thing.
I blink and I blink thinking something will change.
hours pass but my life still remains the same
Yelling yellow yearnings of despair for me to change for someone else to care
Because I left a long time ago
Shadowing centuries ago
Formed into dust because what I must be I cannot discuss
Something scary for me to think outside the little blue box
Sly as a fox but never willing to hop off the soap box and discuss minor mistakes misread
Unlike the beloved dead
I bring forth failure, goal making and half fulfilled promises
I leave behind merry memories, happy beginnings and wondering endings.
I brand things only to be en-lighted that nothing belongs to me only the maker above.
Then my eyes open really wide
The crust and disgust, mucus and deliverance and I focus
and spit.
I know

Tomorrow won't change a damn thing
If it didn't change today when I had all the time in the world
But instead wanted to disguise myself like a small boy or girl
I went to eat all the ice-cream in the world but at the thought pulled to the side and hurled.
Went to climb the highest mountain but instead returned the hiking boots
Insecurities will never deliver me and procrastination makes me the person I strive not to me.
Then I stop and think and ACTUALLY execute the next move...solved?




My energy drinks mimic me, I stay up hard at night
Thoughts running in and out but like my paranoid mind never growing tired
and my feelings grow calluses near the edges but the nicest comment could do fatal damage
And I watch time fly by without my carpet to fly along side it
My tears cried out so now I just sob with the restless
Mind tossing around, never settling so it could cover in the ratchet sheet of my scapegoat
Wondering slut of a mind passion and fruitful delay, I feel absorbed by my paranoid state of mind
I know it's dangerous acting without thinking but its freeing
My thighs burn with the incense of another winner
True, genuine and honest
even if the truth slaps me repeatedly in the face
Heart racing destiny pulling my eyes shut on the fact that this is it
Razor sharp ink strewn across my bloodied worries
The it withstanding a second round
anticipated yet i surrender too stuck on what other people would do I miss it
Ball between my legs I tumble and fall
Syllables fly out of my mouth but the anger does not tumble out after it
Im stuck with dirt intwined with my hair and emotions
Lost in the whirlwind of maturity and reconstructed by the mirror image of perfection.
Slowly combing out the dusty failures of mediocrity and brushing back the flaws of defective genes
I open my heart and grab a spare ball-point pen
Ready to think less and spit more fire.


End of Freshman Fall*

It's the end of my fall semester as a freshman.
It has been an experience and I would love to say a bad one because Claflin wasn't even in my list of schools.
But it has been a great one,
I made new friends, had plenty kodak moments, did NOT gain the freshman 15, adapted to people, weather and professors (SMH)
Learned to work NOW not later
gotten tougher by NGAF
"it be like that sometimes"
Been Ms Fashion Bomb of the Day on my favorite BLOG!
Who would have known???.. and since sarcasm doesn't read well through text and stuff.. sarcasm
Learned how to get ready and dressed in 15 minutes got used to live with someone and put my foot down,
learned how to get over a cold in .5 seconds.
Learned that taking 3 5-hr energy drinks a day isn't good no matter how bad you need them
One of the hardest thing is don't show everyone your nice side because they will just take advantage of it
Don't be greedy of the good times but always ask for more of the happy moments
Learned to get over people quicker then they get over you (lol)
People change like the weather so get used to it
Everyone gossips... EVERYONE
its better to be involved and well known for something, anything, then not known at all.. everyone laughs at "Who??"
Life goes on without you so what are you waiting for??
Sometimes its best to think on your own a second opinion is not needed
Your opinion is the best opinion remember this is YOUR life
Everyone doesn't give-a-damn about your problems
Be a DIVA*DON who cares?
Being your worst is better then someones best!
and wayyyy more
PART TWO coming soon

I enjoyed my freshman fall and hope to accelerate my freshman spring by the lessons learned, bridges unburned and people met.



Who says your fingers have to be suffocated in claustrophobic gloves all winter??

"What's new and hot??" my ring finger asked.
"What about some Bling??" I replied.

Browsing one of my favorite fashion sites I came across the Pom Pom ring ^
It's reasonably priced around $15 to $16 dollars or on Forever21* for around $4 or $5
Some are even rhinestone encrusted.
I even have something similar of my own!
Embedded with flowers and fairy-tale themed items. (how BOMB, what else is better??)
All of this character on one ring and you can have yours like Rihanna this season!!

Get on it!!!
and your fingers will be smiling with glee as well =)

live_ gold

Why run?

I don't know why time is running from me.
I thought I spent it well.
Checking up on it.
Making it feel loved by filling my time with activities..

Or maybe that's where I went wrong.
Maybe time wanted me to stand still and see time passing slowly.

Valuing it for what it was not the potential it could be.
Dangerously lingering on the idea of full schedules and pent up energy to go out and exert on the helpless world.

Time is mad at me.
I don't know exactly why but I wish it would stop.
Hug me around my waist instead of slap me in my face,
Show me affection in front of my friends instead of becoming the jealous significant other,
I wish time understood I didn't want to stand around..

But I guess age is all about patience and wisedom...
All about time...