So,



I always start with so, but so says so much.


This week hasn't gone as planned at all.


Im actually in a computer lab room on Georgia State campus the day before my birthday.


Not that I'm essentially hating my planning but I knew what I was working with when I got here.


Tight money, less friends (some are on Spring Break) and my mom who always craves my attention.

Ive been having an epic time on budget though, surprisingly when people think money is the only way to have fun. The only thing Im missing is a shopping spree. Not to sad though because.... well let's just say the next 24 hours I will be blessed.

I digress


Im actually glad im at state though.


Envisioning myself walking these streets in a couple of months taking classes


only empowers me to be better on top of my grades.


My grades are actually good however, it seems my mom's dominant genes of being a worry freak help


a massive amount when talking about grades.


From emailing to going the extra mile on assignments.


All I have to worry about are my tardies, the few absenses and Music class.


Out of all classes, music class. -_-


Look at my face!


But aside for that, things are looking up, I'm seeing brighter days and guess what!?


Im turning mofo 19!!!


That's a big number for me.


It's no 21 or sweet 16 but it's a milestone for me.! I remember when my sister was 19


and I looked up to her like she ruled the world.


To be realistic, I need to be doing much more with my 19 years.


At 20 I see myself finally starting my longly awaited fashion line including, jewelry and all the other stuff I make,


A job, a condo downtown and a withstanding 4.0


Give me a year though.


Oh yeah and active, aside for my puppy (Miley maybe?)


Taking on yoga or my first love dance which I've been on strike my sophomore year here at Claflin.






Just a side note,


I can't go ANYWHERE without seeing someone I know.


I don't mind, just know I will be feeling myself tomorrow night and forever more.


Coming into oneself doesnt seem so bad anymore.


When you know what type of butterfly youre developing into.

half-way through.

incomplete neccesity...

Denying the possible. Making my self unheard, Lowering my standards. Realizing that i Can be everything i want to be or nothing at all/ Visions, stories, movies all played out in my brain's own movie theatre that dissapear when the sun greets my weary eyes. I dont know why i dream of things so realistic but only occur in my dreams, like i can make them happen because duh.. nothing is unmanegeable but my actions show differ in purpose..
Listening to that sweet voice in my head that keeps me sane, but by sane i mean questioning my motives and actions and denying the circumstances that underly in them. Walking in my own blood leaving my drunken footprints but not feeling the stab wound that punctures it and makes me weak. leak. i laugh at the thought of being discovered but not at the fact that i cover it well or what is uncovered, no but the fact at who will do it..
Who will uncover the mask that hides the heroine... or????
What more could i Be
I strive to be more open more postive and intuitive
but i get sidetracked like a strong case of ADD comes and hits me square in the head.


But i like him
ugh track of subject
he is AWESOME
=]
big screen something to look forward to and this is all he gets.

NEXT

So I havent been doing anything with my life but when i get back to the BOONDOCKS
definetly stepping my game up in the public relations department.
I have to be myself regardless right
so go all out or go home.
kk this is it for now. Hopefully I write one before i leave.

Im going to miss him,
them
and us
whatever that means

New York was fun while it lasted but 'ims' travel farther.
Will thee old flame spark again...
probably not
since the flame has moved to another burning bush.
I havent visited all my friends and i feel bad but I wouldnt be able to anyway... sooo 0=]
I move too fast and I see that now.
"Speeding only gets you ticket in the long run"
niice .

Slow down baby your moving to fast. you got your hands in the air and your feet on the gas.
I Shake my head at the thought of my former motives
Seriously focusing on God my future and career. =]
Cause those are the only things that will take me the farthest.
Thee only rhythm in my life---- my obsession with this thing called love...