Prosper

I went off the edge for the past couple days, I don't know why or when or how but I did.
But now I'm back together and all whole and all that mushy stuff. (I promise) lol
You see the brightest light after the storm, they say and in this situation its so very true.
I prayed, meditated and thought deep about who I was, and want to be.
You also find out who your true friends are in these crazy situations, who your enemies are and who truly does care for you...

No matter how dumb they are.
I hate hurting the people around me, though at one point in time I thought in a way most of it was superficial caring.
I see that light waaaayyyy clearer.
Well I also earned money on my fallout LMBO
It only made me determined to make money in general,
The after affects made me realize how beautiful I AM
and now I feel invincible...

Not sure if that's a good thing. -_-

But most importantly, I value my life and the reproductive investment my mother put into me.
Culturing the fact that I have to become famous and weathly to balance out the highs and lows in my family's lifetime.
It feels like something is just waiting to pop out and I'm not saying that I know the direction to fly in but I believe I'm waiting on a sign.

See thats that invincible stuff* right there.
LOL =]
But all in all Im happier, feel freeier and have more confidence, a confidence I should have had not only for myself but that things I invest my time and effort into, my work and the people who care about me around me.


live_gold

Speaking of

Just an intro... I have had a rollercoaster of a week starting with last Tuesday, I almost felt guilty for being so happy and positive. Now I wish for that feeling back, I proritized and went through my day easily. Now I have to focus more on God, college and my family and not the other oblivious aspects of my life. I believe God takes us through stages in life to reach goals and therefore elevating us as a person. Since college started I'm on a new trail and noone can lead me off.


speaking of diamonds and class and college and growth.
I live like I see fit,
every minute
bit by bit
though some may be humamnized errors to look at oneself miniscule by miniscule
I see nothing wrong since im a young lady..
still in school
I choose now to look at myself as a whole, the world a whole by many
years
decades
eras
memorizing the great ones by the size of their soul
Mistakes come and go leaving misheveled footprints like dirty snow but only wet rimmed eyes can see past the flakes of fake.
Only fake can see fake
so no not I.
The whole that I am can only see real, whole and wonderful things.
The kind of things that pleasant ones bring.
To whom or what I'm speaking to I have no idea.
I speak of diamonds, class, college and growth, that I am, that I see and what I assume makes me
whole.