8.11.10
waiting
waiting
by the window
that shows me direction
envisioning my future and wiping
off my past
leaving faded memories and
distant friendships dripping on the palm of my hand,
I peer out my window
Seating like no other
Feeling the fog the heat from my nose is dispersing,
Waiting for my brain freeze to fully recover.
Blank stares on the other side.
knowing they won't be along for this here ride
Feeling every inch from every mother and daughter
Oh, how they suffer.
long walks on the side of the road
So cold the heat burns
Feeling no love
Only the Yearn
I sit back
head on the head rest
Feeling at my best
with power, liberty and the pursuit of happiness tight
to my chest.
-nik_gold
3.11.10
2.11.10
28.10.10
I don't know, I don't know!
I CANNOT blog when I'm full of emotion.
It's like I have to revisit the topic or I KNOW I will
want to reword what I say.
Maybe it's because I never feel like I cover it all...
Or that first emotion is too raw for TV.
Whatever the case. It sucks.
Cause the first emotion is the most beautiful.
The here after, barely fits.
-_-
27.10.10
26.10.10
Tyler Perry has done it again! Contributing to the heavy realization of the black movie business being more than comedy, but growth, spirituality and life lessons. From the first preview I saw I wanted to see this movie!
"For Colored Girls Only" had me at the title, kept me with the talent, Janet Jackson, Loretta Devine, Kimberly Elise, Whoopi Goldberg, Phylicia Rashad, Anika Noni Rose, Jill Scott, Macy Gray etc , and "For Colored Girls Only" is just one of twenty influential poems, spoken by seven women, each with their own major problem dilemna and fighting through it.
I give it a MUST SEE
especially for all colored girls
and dont hesitate bringing tissue to this movie!
****
"Become Yourself"
This may not be the sweetest post to anyways tongue.
But it quite frankly needs to be put out of my system, my aura, my space.
It's ruining my mood and my developing outlook on the world.
I was "Chilling" yesterday.
Normal day in Orangeburg,
Dreary, depressing and redundant.
But I make the best... sometimes, by chilling.
Chilling which could be a number of things but right now I'm not getting specific
cause chilling was never the problem.
However the person I choose to chill with yesterday stirred a lot up in me.
I am not one to shy away from arguments especially
when I am heavily connected to the topic, but chill buddy yesterday crossed, drew and ran right threw the line.
Things I hold close to me are what anyone else would hold close to theirs.
Plus this here blog.
Having it for some years, it is my buddy ol pal.
My closest buddy I can voice my opinions and know they will be heard.
What I post is real, authentic and at times embarrassing but
it's my way to voice myself and I wouldnt change it for the world
I don't keep an in depth journal and tis why I
don't get so personal on this here blog.
I mean this is still the internet.
Business EVERY WHICH WAY.
....
But I digress.
Chill buddy yesterday
basically asked me being who I am, what I talked about on my blog.
That not being such a problem though, chill buddy has been in my life for more than a year,
knowing about my blog and visiting should have came hand in hand,
But however, I gave that one away.
Maybe he (yes he), is not the blog, computer or even internet type.
The closest he may get to the internet is the keyboard on his phone.
-_- maybe.
So I elaborated a little about what my blog was about...
Wasn't even finished my God damned sentence when..
YEAH
"Who are you, though? To right this stuff, like who is nik_gold? Am I a source to care?"
came slurring out of his mouth.
Now I know he may not be the only one to have that question,
nik_gold?
blogger?
what's that?
But the way you undermine someone for their worth and
meaning limits them as a
person, and what they could someday be...
Plus, blogging is freeeeeeeee, internet is unlimited and
what I do with my site is everything and ANYTHING for me.
It's my Myspace reloaded, Facebook 7.0, TwitterPLUS,
It's my open end to a closed fist and anyone with a problem can just not read,
go read necole Bitchie or something and have a nice day.
Now I don't know who my readers surround themselves with but
someone who is willing to down something or someone before they fully understand
anything and you chill with them, and theyre arent giving you advice.
PUHLEASE
I think less of them than all the racist, timids, morbids, close minded, individuals in the world
especially since I was chilling with you in redundant, depressing Orangeburg trying to make the best of it.
Spit.
Your belief that one person can mean nothing makes YOU less than anything.
25.10.10
14.10.10
It was nice too.
and quite lengthy...
and quite lengthy...
I didn't really expect it
but welcomed it fully with open arms.
You have never done anything
significant in life if nothing is permanetly made for you.
Or maybe I'm just thinking this way
because I have my own poem now...
Either way,
My gratitude, humbleness and applause is granted
to the lovely poet.
If you didn't write the poem
=X
=X
Realized no one's life is simple and cute.
But intwining with events, people and accomidies that just nearly fill in the blanks.
A notebook with no paper.
Left unfulfilled until someone glues the restless pages back in.
What kind of life to live when no one trully fits in?
Bumping into each others' messes like a Coney Island joy ride.
How distant a path we pave blinded by ignorance
The bittersweet consequences we all bring.
No one's life is simple and cute
I rebuttle
Because Life is nothing short of suttle
Not meant to cuddle
We can only fess up and confide
In our bear for the moment, the friend
who may be oh so kind
Making memories to last a lifetime
While cementing our attitudes toward life and beyond.
No one's life is simple and cute.
It surely is not a suit
Anyone could wear
Drifting to the side of our parallel life
Like old pajama wear
We lay our heads to dream these dreams
Complicated as they seem
Simply the truth seen and unseen.
Beyond the pages, glue and despair
We are all left to be complicated amongst each other
To win, to lose, someone must dare
12.10.10
Old Honest Souls
Old souls are the best
Not only are they experienced and very wise
But they are no nonsense.
Life is fun when you use your time wisely.
But what these old honest souls have figured out is that
there is no time to bs.
Grab hold to a old honest soul
They will take you around the world
And leave a smile on your face
When its their time to leave
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